"Portions of this work were originally published in different form in 'The New York times.'"--Title page verso.

Includes bibliographical references (pages 277-291) and index.

Part 1. I see you: The power of being seen ; How not to see a person ; Illumination ; Accompaniment ; What is a person? ; Good talks ; The right questions -- Part 2. I see you in your struggles: The epidemic of blindness ; Hard conversations ; How do you serve a friend who is in despair? ; The art of empathy ; How were you shaped by your sufferings? -- Part 3. I see you with your strengths: Personality : what energy do you bring into the room? ; Life tasks ; Life stories ; How do your ancestors show up in your life? ; What is wisdom?

Drawing from the fields of psychology and neuroscience and from the worlds of theater, philosophy, history and education, one of the nation's leading writers and commentators helps us become more understanding and considerate toward others, and to find the joy that comes from being seen.

"As David Brooks observes, 'There is one skill that lies at the heart of any healthy person, family, school, community organization, or society: the ability to see someone else deeply and make them feel seen--to accurately know another person, to let them feel valued, heard, and understood.' And yet we humans don't do this well. All around us are people who feel invisible, unseen, misunderstood. In 'How to know a person,' Brooks sets out to help us do better, posing questions that are essential for all of us: If you want to know a person, what kind of attention should you cast on them? What kind of conversations should you have? What parts of a person's story should you pay attention to? Driven by his trademark sense of curiosity and his determination to grow as a person, Brooks draws from the fields of psychology and neuroscience and from the worlds of theater, philosophy, history, and education to present a welcoming, hopeful, integrated approach to human connection. [This book] helps readers become more understanding and considerate toward others, and to find the joy that comes from being seen. Along the way it offers a possible remedy for a society that is riven by fragmentation, hostility, and misperception. The act of seeing another person, Brooks argues, is profoundly creative: How can we look somebody in the eye and see something large in them, and in turn, see something larger in ourselves?"-- Publisher's website, viewed on May 15, 2024.